On Friday I did about ten different things, and Saturday I did nothing and drifted all over the place and felt sorry for myself. Today was work holiday and I worked with the techies (all male, of course) and we were supposed to work on wiring the house and they all sat around and grated at each other and we got very little accomplished and I was a total snot the whole time, but in a good sort of way, and it was really a little silly. We didn't plan ahead at all, and it was Sunday so we basically didn't have any supplies that we needed and we didn't have any plan for what we wanted to accomplish or how, so basically there were just the four of us standing around in the hallway getting in each other's ways and getting in the way of all the people trying to clean. But honestly it was kind of fun. I got to be a snot, for one. And I figured a lot of practical things out that they just totally weren't thinking of. And I just now figured out the solution to one of the problems we were having, so next time I see one of them, I'll have to gloat. Wee. A girl who actually knows shit about tech stuff. Some shit anyway.

I don't know. None of this is interesting, and its not really what's in my head.

I want to be in love with someone again. I was out of sorts for a couple of days (honestly still am a bit) and its the kind of "out of sorts" that I associate with wanting a hug. So I got a hug, and it didn't help at all. So what I really associate it with is wanting a hug from someone I love. I don't know. This is better than before where I had to stop every day and decide to keep living because I didn't want to be not living.

Yah.

and really it all sounds worse than it is. Or maybe its more that its not so bad anymore, but it probably was.

ok. 'nuff now. roomate's here and i have to get up really really early tomorrow and do all the work that i didn't do this weekend. And that's a LOT.

go to the 'ship and look around. make me a Mixtape